“I close my eyes
Only for a moment and the moment’s gone
All my dreams
Pass before my eyes with curiosity
Dust in the wind
All they are is dust in the wind.”
RIP Billy Mays
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Pukeasauras Rex
Latin – “King of Pukers”
The above picture shows the unidentifiable creature known as Pukeasauras Rex. The creature was spotted late Saturday evening at 3636 S. Union. Groans were heard in the basement were various people saw the once elusive creature. P-Rex filled a makeshift garbage can, made of a Miller Lite case with a plastic bag, with Chex Mix and Gyros. Although no picture of the elusive P-Rex from that night could be found, this is an apparent picture of the creature in his natural habitat.
The History Channel commented they would investigate the Pukeasauras Rex on their next episode of Monster Quest.
Tommy’s commented that his plans for the 4th of July are, “To attend a party on Friday the 3rd, in luau of the 4th of July on Saturday.” Tommy also showed sadness that his friend was going to play the ukulele and not his favorite instrument, the bass (pronounced the fish, not the instrument).
While many of us thought the likes of Vince could never be affected by the current recession, we were wrong. This photographic evidence shows Vince in his part time job as a Pirate of the Seven Seas. If it is not bad enough that he is practicing piracy, he recruited Caruso to be his first mate. In the back left of this photograph Caruso is clearly seen swimming back to the ship from his wave runner, leaving the treasure on it.
The only way we could identify the body was because of the Winter Classic t-shirt. No word has been heard on the whereabouts of the Winter Classic hat.
Ron Kittle saved the day as he seperates Fred and Paul
A Saturday evening nearly ruined by two employees of Ron Kittle’s Brat Stand arguing.
The fight began early in the day when Fred “Can’t Fight Frank Vulich” Walz and Paul “Soft” Morris started to argue. Fred easily won the first contest of who has a better upper body, in which John Caruso commented, “Fred has the best upper body in Twin Lakes” numerous times. Paul came back in the next round by beating Fred in the girlfriend contest 1-0.
A near fight broke out near the end of the day for reasons unknown. Fearing a complete breakdown of the stand, employee Richard Paladino phoned Ron Kittle himself, Rich commented, “I remember the numerous times Fred and I had fought and Paul stopped them, usually Paul would scream, ‘Stop the Presses!!! You two are friends and coworkers!!! Does anyone know the number for 911!!’ so I had to do something.” Kittle easily diffused the situation and seperated the two.
Tensions flared after the contest when Kittle ate a brat and commented, “Wow this Brat is not undercooked, Fred must have made it.”
Sources say the woman in the above picture was intoxicated, she felt sorry for Vince and took a picture with him. Vince is reportedly using a crutch to gain sympathy from women. The unidentified man in the picture, who seems way stronger/leaner than Vince, refused to take part in the picture and leaned away.
This is far different from the Vince we all knew years ago for two main reasons:
1.) Old school Vince didn’t need sympathy from girls to get their attention.
2.) The crutch in question is made of Titanium to support Vince’s extremely husky frame, old school Vince could have used a crutch made of weak PVC piping.
