Chicago, IL, February 28, 2010 — Earlier this evening BVT released a message via Facebook, informing the world that he is being held  against his will.

“I am not living here by choice,” BVT declared.  The S.O.S. continued, “My family…was brought here as slaves.”

It is unclear who brought BVT’s family here as slaves or whether those same people are currently holding him captive.  No ransom note has been released.  The demands of his captors are unclear.

Also unclear is how BVT accessed the internet to post his statement.  Due to the statement’s correct syntax and spelling, experts opine that the post was not posted from his mobile device and that perhaps he had help writing it.

A search party will begin looking for BVT at sunrise tomorrow morning.  The search is to begin at Punky’s, if it is open.

-Booyow Press

Last 5 posts by bruno

• For Immediate Release: The Drink Police on Patrol at Halligan Bar - March 23rd, 2010
• Smug, Unemployed, Depressed Man Observant, Critical of Everyone Else - January 21st, 2010
• Jerk of the Day #2 - January 8th, 2010
• Jerks of the Day #1 - January 8th, 2010
• Live Blogging Raw! - January 4th, 2010